Wedding

A wedding may be defined as the formal ceremonies and celebration that have to do with two persons coming together in marriage. While marriages are referred to often in the Bible, we know very little about what is involved. Only two weddings are reported with some details in the Bible, that of Samson and the Philistine woman in Judg 14, and that at Cana which Jesus attended and where he performed his first miracle of turning water into wine (Jn 2:1-11). Some have suggested a possible wedding in the Song of Songs, but, as poetic literature, its language is too figurative to attach anything as objective or historical. At any rate, we know very little about the details of what was actually involved, apart from the celebratory feasting.

Today, of course, we assume that a church wedding should be the norm, and every vicar knows how often they get requests from non-Christians who ask to have a church wedding. It should be remembered, however, that there were no such thing as a 'church wedding' for at least the first three hundred years of the Church's life; Christianity was illegal and an underground movement subject often to persecutions. This is, of course, not to suggest that church weddings are not important. The fact simply restores a more balanced perspective on things. Not only that, but as Christian leaders it is important for us to counsel young couples planning to get married that the wedding is a one-day affair, the marriage is forever and it is the latter on which they should place their emphasis as they prepare for their life together. An elaborate and expensive wedding can no more produce a strong marriage than an expensive oven is guaranteed to bake a better loaf of bread.

Customary to a church wedding is—and at least one of the high points of the wedding ought to be—the wedding sermon. Unfortunately most preachers seem to think that they can dispense with the solemnity and seriousness of preaching when it comes to the sermon at a wedding. In fact, most preachers don't know what the sermon is supposed to do and it often descends into some frivolous tips for a good marriage. The wedding is too late for such flimsy pep-talks. To you lay-preachers who are the intended audience of Alberith, let us remind you: if you are ever to preach at a wedding, Make It Count, as all sermons ought to count. This was powerfully brought home to me when, many years after I had preached one such sermon, I met the then-bride again (they had move to another part of the country). She then related to me how she and her husband had gotten though some very rough patches in their relationship in the earlier years of their marriage but had finally gotten over and were now enjoying their life together. She shared that one of the things that helped here greatly was the sermon I preached at their wedding. She had a video-tape of the sermon, and every time things got really rough, they would play the recording and it would help them re-center their frayed hearts to work at their marriage with renewed passion. Whatever else we may think of the wedding, we should make them count for the couple and for God. Yes, even if the couple requests if the sermon could be evangelistic.